Thursday, December 13, 2012

The End of Fall Quarter

has finally come. Finals are finished. I'm so exhausted; mentally and physically. Looking back, the quarter seemed to go by so fast, but at the same time, I felt like it was drawn out. It probably wasn't my best quarter academically, since I didn't strive for my best. Instead, I just wanted to get by. I guess you could say I have my head in the clouds, which is partly true. I'm a dreamer and I have this desire to get out and explore. However, the rational part of me keeps beating me down with the sinking truth of reality. This inner conflict just bubbles under the surface of my skin, making the quarter uncomfortable and unbearable. But now, it's over. What next?

Sure, I have winter quarter left and ten more weeks of academia. But it won't be the same. I'll be applying for jobs and waiting. Waiting for what? Well, I don't even know. I just know something's going to happen. Something's coming my way. And so in the mean time, I'll be taking some classes. Half will be creative workshop classes, so the work load will be comparably easier than previous quarters, and the other half... well, I'll get by as usual.

As commencement approaches,  I'm starting to feel uneasy and I don't know why. I try to remind myself that this is what I wanted, so what am I so afraid of? The worst I can do is fall on stage, right?

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